Not Today
by Pearlynn
Summary: There is only one thing we say to Death... Keith Angst taking place after "A New Defender" at the end of Season 4. Mild Kallura, lots of Paladin Brotp.


_Disclaimer: I do not own Voltron._

 _ **A/N** This story picks up at the end of "A New Defender" and this fan art by **thebitterbaby** that I found. Just copy and past the stuff below and get rid of the spaces and you'll find it._

 **thebitterbaby . tumblr post / 166603168606 / shock - realization**

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His ship docked in the Red Lion's hangar, an instinctual location that he didn't even think about going to. It just... happened. The Galra fighter he had been flying skidded across the floor, falling to a stop on it's left side. He stumbled out, head still swimming and thoughts racing about the last hour. The second his feet hit the ground, he heard the warbled shouts of his fellow paladins behind the ringing in his ears, followed by loud footsteps as multiple people ran towards him. He blinked the shock out of his eyes right as Allura's arms were slung around his shoulders and he was pulled into a fierce hug.

It took him a fraction of the time to return the hug than the last time she had sprung one on him, and soon he was burying his face in the warmth of her neck and breathing her in. He must have been shaking, because one of her hands came up to cup the back of his head as she started hushing him in his ear. He heard the indistinct sounds of the other paladins swarming around him, hands gripping his shoulders and wrapping around him as they joined in on the hug.

"It's alright, man, we're here. We're okay. You're okay."

Keith would have laughed at the softness in Lance's voice, but he couldn't get past the thickness in his throat. He felt Pidge clutch to his torso and bury her face against his ribs while Hunk squeezed him and the rest of the paladins from behind. Vaguely, he realized, there was one set of familiar arms he didn't feel around him. He blinked away the new tears that had gathered in his eyes and looked up from Allura's shoulder to see Shiro standing away from the group, his fists clenched and his jaw tight. What surprised Keith the most was the cold anger in his normally warm and kind eyes.

" _What_ were you thinking?"

The other paladins loosened their grips on Keith and turned to their leader, who had taken up an even angrier aura. Allura was the first to jump to his defense, her hand reaching down to clutch his and guide him behind her as she turned around and squared up to the Black Paladin.

"Shiro, now is not the time."

Keith withered under Shiro's sharp glare and he ducked his head, now even more ashamed of his actions than before. There was a dull ache behind his eyes and he tried his hardest to blink away the tears he felt, to no avail. They splattered on the tops of his feet as he stared down, trying to phase out the conversation - or rather, argument - in front of him.

"He could have _died,_ Princess. Does that not even faze you?"

Allura's grip tightened around his hand and she pressed her back against his chest. "It _does_ but right now is not the best time to be yelling at him about it."

Keith faintly felt Lance's hand grip his shoulder in a show of support as he said, "Yeah, lay off for a bit. We're all a little heated from the battle and we need some time to cool off."

"And we've got to deal with Prince Lotor, in case anyone forgot about him," Hunk piped up, his hand on Keith's other shoulder and patting it softly.

Keith lifted his head enough to look at Shiro once more, and he had noticed the Black Paladin's eyes had never left him. He couldn't help but grip Allura's hand a little tighter as he fought another tremor of guilt and pain. Keith noticed Pidge had left his side and was now standing in front of Allura, her arms crossed and face hard.

"I'm with them on this one, Shiro," she said with a tight voice. "Prince Lotor needs to be interrogated. He can't sit up with Coran and Matt forever. We have to go talk to him before he changes his mind."

There was a mullish set in Shiro's jaw as he glared at the team, then he sighed and partially deflated. "Fine. But Keith?"

Said man lifted his chin so he was facing Shiro fully. He ground his teeth together and swallowed thickly as his brother-in-arms frowned and said, "We'll discuss this later. I need everyone on their top game with Lotor. I'll lead the interrogation-"

"Actually," Allura cut in sharply, "I should lead the interrogation. I know more about the Galra than any of you, beside Keith, and since he is a Prince we should be treating this as a diplomatic situation. I have the highest rank in the Castle so I should take point."

"Is he still technically a Prince?" Hunk asked over Keith's shoulder. "I mean, Zarkon did disown him and label him an enemy of the Empire _and_ he's marked for death so..."

"Yes, but his station still deserves respect, even from enemies," Allura stated, her voice level and clear with authority. No one was going to question it. "Rather, former enemies now."

Keith's eyes never left Shiro, who had gone to staring at Allura like she had grown another head. But as he went to retort, Lance patted Keith on the shoulder and started heading towards the elevator. "I'm with Allura. He might only want to talk to her, anyway. Might as well beat him to the punch and come out with the big guns."

Hunk and Pidge followed Lance, the latter giving Shiro a disappointed look before turning and shaking her head. Allura kept staring him down, still standing in front of Keith as if to protect him from the Black Paladin's unexpected rage. Shiro frowned and then made to follow the rest of the team. As soon as he was far enough away, Allura whirled around and hugged Keith again, the force of her body knocking the breath out of him.

"Oh, by the ancients, you are a stupid, _stupid_ man."

Keith's breath lodged in his throat and his fought the burning in his eyes again. He tightened his hold on her and pressed his face to her neck as he murmured, "I'm sorry."

Allura's hand tangled in his hair and she shook her head furiously. "Please don't apologize. Not now. I just want to make sure you're alright."

He hugged her tighter and inhaled a ragged breath. He didn't trust his words, so he merely shook his head and hugged her close again. Allura sighed and she rubbed his head once more.

"Please don't ever do something like that again," she whispered into his hair. "You scared the quiznak out of us."

"How did you even know what I did?"

She sighed and her head dropped to his shoulder. "While you were escorting Lotor to the Castle, Matt filled us in. He had radioed us as soon as Lotor had gotten off the line and told us everything. When we are Voltron, we are connected to each other. We all felt Shiro's anger at your attempted sacrifice, and the fear from the others. Lance went as far to claim you were taking the 'samurai' persona too seriously by becoming a kamikaze, whatever that is."

Keith snorted, that was a very Lance-like thing to say at a moment like that, and he made to step away from Allura's embrace. She didn't let him, instead holding him tighter and nuzzling her face into his neck. In that moment, he wished he wasn't in his Marmora armor. It felt suffocating and stifling, like it was closing him off to the one comfort offered to him at that moment.

His fingers itched to claw it off and cast it aside, to hold Allura close and let himself _feel_ something for once. Let himself have the one thing that made him regret even attempting to crash his ship into the battle cruiser's shield.

"We need to go," she finally said after a few more moments, sliding her hands away from his shoulders. She met his eyes for the first time since he landed in the Castle and he could see the redness from her own tears. She wiped away the ones that lingered on his face then gave him a wobbly smile. "They're expecting us."

Keith merely nodded and followed her as she headed towards the elevator. She stayed close, not walking to fast or lingering behind him, instead she was only one pace ahead of him. They rode the elevator in silence, and Keith never lifted his gaze from the ground. The only thing he focused on was the close presence of Allura's shoulder and hand to his, practically pressing against him and grounding him to her.

The doors opened to the common room where they had once interrogated Ulaz and they were met with seven pairs of eyes, one of which was much more inquisitive than the others. Keith pulled his hood up as he followed Allura to the handcuffed Galran Prince, lingering behind the Paladins as she stepped forward and stared him down.

"Well, I may say, Princess Allura, you are much more exquisite than I could have ever fathomed."

He heard collective growls coming from everyone else, but Allura simply raised her hand to calm them before crossing it over her chest. "And you are as _charming_ as I've heard, Prince Lotor. Tell me, why exactly are you suggesting an alliance when you have been antagonizing us for phoebs?"

Keith saw Lotor's eyes dart around and analyze all of the Paladins. This had been his first time seeing them all, and he probably was just as shocked at their appearance as they had been with his. In fact, Lotor looked more like Allura in his features than Zarkon, which troubled Keith more than he'd like to admit.

Then, Lotor's eyes landed on him, burning and questioning as he took in the armor Keith wore and the hood drawn over his head. He narrowed his gaze, lingering on him a moment longer before bringing his attention back to Allura. His smirk grew and he replied, "As you may know, my father has put a target on my back. It doesn't quite suit me to be fleeing for the rest of my life, and as much as he knows this, I am a threat to him and his empire. It seems it is in my best interest as well as yours if we join forces and take him down together."

Lance stepped forward and leaned down so he was practically nose to nose with the Prince. "So you basically want us to shield you while you take down your own father? How do we know you're not going to stab us in the back once we're no longer an asset for you?"

Lotor look positively affronted by Lance's brusque tone, and also his lack of regard for personal space, then swallowed as he made to ignore him and address Allura once more, "There are secrets I know, plans I had in action that my father had no knowledge of. Unless my traitorous generals decided to tell Haggar of these plans, I still have the upper hand."

"And why would you trust us with this information when you've been nothing but an enemy to us?" Allura inquired with a steely tone.

"Because I want my father gone just as much as you do," Lotor supplied as he shrugged with one shoulder. "It's no secret he exiled me long ago, only for Haggar to request my return when he was on his deathbed. The fact that he recovered was as much of a shock to me as it likely was to you."

"But surely there's something else you're not telling us," Shiro declared as he stepped to Allura's side and crossed his arms. "Why else would you attack your own people and try to take a piece of the Teledav? Or steal the Trans-Reality Comet?"

Lotor's smirk grew as he raised his eyes to meet Shiro's. "So many questions, brave Paladin. But I will not answer any until we have a certain agreement. I can't go spilling all of my secrets without knowing I will get something in return."

A little surprised at Shiro's lack of subtlety and Lotor's knowing grin, Keith looked over and noticed Lance had crossed his arms and was openly glaring at Shiro - something he wanted to get to the bottom of real quick. Hunk, Matt, Pidge and Coran were murmuring to each other, while Allura glanced up at Shiro then back at Keith, pleading with him to give her an option with this man.

With a deep breath, Keith strode forward and stood to Allura's right, staring down at Lotor with the hardest glare he could muster in this moment. The Prince met his gaze and waited, anticipating what Keith would offer. There was intrigue simmering in his eyes, and curiosity deep in their dark depths. Keith was going to need to tread carefully around him. There's no guessing what this Galran would do.

"I can speak for everyone here when I say we can't trust you further than we can throw you, aside from Allura," he said, feeling a swell of pride as he saw Allura grin at his subtle comment. "We have to know we can trust you and the information before we act on anything. So you have to give us a reason to believe what you're saying."

"Also, it is not entirely up to us whether or not an agreement can be founded between us," Allura added in, almost leaning towards Keith as Lotor moved his penetrating gaze to her. "I would have to confer with the other Rebel leaders in the Voltron Coalition before we even consider any sort of agreement. Until then, I would suggest you get comfortable in the holding cells while we deliberate."

Without saying anything further, she nodded to Hunk and Shiro, who approached Lotor and started leading him out of the brig. The Prince's smirk never left his lips, even when his eyes went to Keith once more. Keith only glared in return, watching him as he left the room and was led down the hall. When the doors closed, he watched as Lance kicked one of the chairs and folded his arms tightly across his chest as he plopped himself down on the couch.

"This is so _quiznaking_ frustrating."

"Lance, I know you are completely against having Lotor as an ally but consider the benefits of having someone with his inside knowledge on our side," Pidge reasoned as she sat down next to him. "He can give us updated fleet movements and battle plans as if he was feeding them to us as they were happening. He may be a dick but he would be a good asset in the fight against Zarkon."

Lance merely growled and glared off to the side, avoiding anyone else's gaze as he glowered. Keith looked back to Allura, who had adopted a thoughtful look on her face, her lip stuck between her teeth and her eyes narrowed as she rested her chin on her fist.

"Princess? What would you like us to do?"

She blinked and looked up at Matt after he spoke, then she sighed and rubbed the side of her head. "I suppose we need to contact the leaders within the Coalition, get them all on the line and discuss what our options are. Coran, please set a course for Olkarion. Matt, if you could please radio your contacts that are still in commission and see if they would be available for a conference before we arrive at Olkarion. I want to gather their thoughts on this new development..."

"Yes, ma'am," Matt replied with a short bow. He passed Keith, lingering only a second to pat him on the shoulder and give him a small smile. Keith smiled in return then watched as Coran approached him and silently patted him on the head before heading up to the bridge.

"Allura, what do you think we should do?" Pidge asked once Matt and Coran had left the room.

The Princess bit her lip again and turned to Keith, silently asking what he thought she should do. He felt he had no idea what they could do, let alone what the best course of action was. Prince Lotor had been their number one enemy for the past few months, ever since Zarkon had been out of commission. Lotor seemed to be more cunning and ruthless, taking them down at every corner and always remaining a few steps ahead of them.

That type of person would definitely be a good ally, but it would be hard to trust him. He had no true reason to help them other than to help himself, and as of this moment he wasn't offering anything to them until they granted him clemency.

"I suppose we hear him out," Allura sighed as she let her shoulders sag. "At least, see if he has anything to offer that will prevent us from keeping him as a captive or killing him ourselves. He could have valuable intel that we need to take down Zarkon for good, and if he's as much of a fan of self-preservation as he seems, he will comply quickly."

"I still don't like it," Lance grumbled from his seat.

"I don't either but it's not like we have a choice," Keith admitted with distaste. "He helped us win the battle today. The least we can do is give him quarter."

Lance turned and met his gaze, the acknowledgement of Keith's silent words hitting him hard: _He saved my life. He saved all of our lives. Let's see if he's worth saving, too._ His eyes glistened and he sighed before uncrossing his arms. "I don't want this biting us in the asses down the road."

Keith felt himself grin as he immediately replied, "I'll be sure to let you gloat about being right if it does."

The Blue Paladin snorted and stood, then approached Keith. He opened his arms wide and gave him a tight and brotherly hug. "I'm glad you're okay, man."

Keith patted him on the back and replied stiffly, "Thanks, man."

Lance grinned at him as he pulled away and then quickly punched the palm of his own hand as he exclaimed, "Alright, let's go show Loturd who's boss!"

Pidge snickered as she followed him out of the room, waving at Allura and Keith after flashing Keith a waggle of her eyebrows. He almost rolled his eyes at the playfulness of his teammates, but instead he let himself feel the warmth of their affection towards him and their show of solidarity since he boarded the ship.

"Keith?"

He turned his attention from the door to Allura, who had resumed chewing on her lip and thoughtfully cupping her chin. "Yeah?"

She took a deep breath and sat on the couch, careful in her actions and tentative as she thought of what to say. He let her mull it over for a moment, his own weariness from the day starting to cloud all other thoughts in his mind. In fact, all he wanted to do in that moment was crawl under his covers and sleep away the exhaustion he was feeling, as well as push away the dread that had settled in his stomach like a concrete brick.

"I need you to contact Kolivan," she stated in a tone that told Keith that was not what she originally wanted to say. "He's going to want to know if you're alright and what the status of the mission is."

Keith deflated minutely and nodded, then reached into his pack to contact his leader.

"Also..."

He looked to her again to she her eyes had gotten a little misty, and she looked like she was trying her best not to cry. That dread in his stomach sunk even more, knowing that he was the cause of her duress, and he pushed back the guilt that was starting to gnaw at his heart.

"I know it really is not my place to tell you what to do," she started with a hesitant whisper, "but I think it might be best for you to return to Voltron, to us."

Keith's heart dropped and he felt the shame creep back up, blaming him for the pain she was showing. Why did she want him back? All he did was cause strife for her and their teammates. If he came back, the extra paladin problem would be back and he would be stuck sitting on the sidelines, whereas with the Blade of Marmora he could be actively aiding Voltron in ending the war.

Allura lifted her eyes and set her jaw as she continued, "I told you before that the Blade of Marmora can go on without you, and they will. What they've done to you... what they've made you believe is not who you are. Your life is not worthless, and you're not some pawn. You need to be somewhere with people who love you, not with people who encourage you to give your life away for the sake of the mission, especially when there are other options."

Keith averted his eyes and he inhaled a ragged breath. As much as he hated to hear it, he knew her words were the truth.

"Allura..."

"Do not say there's no place for you here," she cut in gently, her tone so different from how it had been when she interrupted Shiro. "We will always need you."

He dared a glance up at her, only to regret it when he saw the wistful hope on her face. She wanted him back with them in the Castle, despite all that had happened. The twinkle in her cotton-candied eyes made his heart stutter with its own hope, that maybe - just maybe - he could come back and be a part of the team again. But he knew deep down it wouldn't work. Someone would have to step away from their Lion or he would have to stay in the Castle during battles, neither of which seemed like a good scenario for anyone involved.

 _"Princess, we have the Rebel Leaders on the line,"_ Matt said over the intercoms, cutting their conversation short. Keith saw her deflate and curl into herself in defeat as the older Holt sibling continued, _"They would like you to update them on the situation."_

 _"Also, Princess, I'm going to need you to make a wormhole so we can jump to Olkarion,"_ Coran added, causing Allura to sag even more.

"I'll be up momentarily," she called back, her eyes withering and a sigh leaving her. The comms were turned off and immediately Keith went to her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. She clutched onto him tight and buried her face into his neck.

"We can talk about this later, okay?"

Allura sighed again and nodded, then pulled away from the hug. Her smile was tight, but it was there and that was all he could ask for. Together, they walked to the elevators with their hands brushing occasionally. Allura stepped in, turned and then frowned when she realized Keith hadn't followed her.

"Are you coming?"

He shook his head and pulled his communicator out of his pocket. "I still need to contact Kolivan. And I was wanting to go speak to Lotor, figure out his motives before we strike the deal. Maybe even get some information to present to the Rebel leaders."

"Good plan," she replied with a warmer smile, eyes twinkling with affection and unspoken promises. She pressed the button to go up and the doors closed, leaving Keith alone in the silent hallway with his thoughts.

As soon as he knew he was alone, he let himself truly crumble. His back pressed against the wall and he sunk down, his shoulders trembling and his eyes burning with shameful tears. He almost _died_. He was about to sacrifice himself to save his friends, all without them knowing. Had he crashed into that shield and his plan had worked, Voltron would have been safe and the rebels could have taken out the battle cruiser and stopped the witch from setting off the bomb in Naxzela. But they wouldn't know at what price their victory would have cost.

His vision swam and he felt half-tempted to hurl, his stomach curling in on itself and twisting up into his lungs until he was gasping for air that wouldn't come in. His heart was pounding relentlessly against his rib cage, threatening to burst out. He clutched at his chest, his vital monitor in his ear blaring its alarm at his sudden lack of oxygen and racing heartbeat.

Unfortunately the Blade of Marmora didn't program their suits to recognize anxiety attacks.

The pounding in his ears grew and everything in front of him doubled. His gasps were getting tight and painful, to the point that he thought he was going to pass out. There was more pounding, now out of sync with the original pounds and suddenly hands were gripping at his shoulders and a face came into view.

The shock of white hair was enough to tell him who had found him on the floor, but that did not comfort him. Shiro was changed, he didn't care. He didn't care when Keith started pulling away, he didn't care when Keith left. And he certainly didn't care that he almost died based on his reaction when they first saw each other in the hangar.

"Keith! Keith, buddy look at me! _Breathe_ , bud. Breathe."

Keith blinked and his vision started to clear, but his lungs still weren't working and his heart was beating faster than hummingbird wings.

"Breathe, Keith, breathe with me."

The urgency in Shiro's voice echoed in his head, reminding him of a time long ago when Shiro didn't have a scarred nose and Keith had been panicking after his dad died. He focused on Shiro's eyes, locking on the familiar obsidian and forcing himself to _listen_ and just _fucking breathe._

"Good, keep breathing like that."

He sucked in another deep breath and sputtered, doubling over and gasping as his breathing finally caught up with his lungs and the sweet relief of oxygen swept through his blood. Shiro's hand rubbed his back and Keith could hear him still coaching him, his voice now louder as the pounding in his ears dimmed and his heart started to slow.

"Jeez, Keith you just scared the shit out of me."

Without thinking, Keith coughed up a laugh and turned to give Shiro a weak smirk, "Language."

Shiro cuffed him on the back of his head then sunk down off of his knees, propping himself up with his hands as he watched Keith start to reorient himself. "Are you alright?"

"As alright as I'll ever be," Keith hoarsely replied as he moved to sit back up.

"I can't remember the last time you had an episode like that."

"I do," Keith muttered as he fidgeted with his gloves and pulled them off. "Right after you disappeared."

He saw Shiro's face fall at that remark. As much as Keith hated to admit it, Shiro was a different person than the man he knew before Kerberos. There were still things that hadn't changed, but Keith knew deep down that the Shiro in front of him was not the Shiro that showed him the rocket that was taking them to space and joking about meeting aliens.

War did that to people.

"I'm sorry for how I reacted earlier."

Keith picked at the bottom of his boot. "It's alright. It's been a stressful day. We're all feeling it."

"You more so than the others," Shiro commented, causing Keith to glance up at him again. The Black Paladin sighed and looked down the hall towards where Lotor was currently being held and continued, "I would never have guessed you were willing to do something like that, so when Matt told us I was completely floored. I knew you had self-destructive tendencies, but not that much. I... I was afraid I wouldn't be able to help you this time."

Keith watched as Shiro struggled to find more words, eyes narrowing as he looked off in the distance and rolled his jaw. Exhaustion was getting the better of him and Keith swore up and down that Shiro looked like he was holding something back, that he wasn't be completely honest. His stupid rotten heart told him that his brother-in-arms was feigning his concern, especially when Keith considered how angry he had been when they had met in the hangar.

But it didn't matter. Not right now. There was a mission at hand that was bigger than any petty squabble or distancing of teammates.

With a sigh, Keith grabbed his communicator. "I need to contact Kolivan. Go keep an eye on Lotor and I'll be there in a minute."

Keith looked out of the corner of his eye to see Shiro staring at him strangely, possibly affronted by Keith's blatant dismissal and ignoring of what Shiro had last said. Without replying, Shiro stood, staring down his nose as Keith remained on the floor, and gave him a short nod before heading back down the hallway.

Once Shiro was around the corner, Keith tapped the communicator's link to Kolivan and waited until his leader popped up on the screen.

"Keith! What happened? Where are you? Is Voltron alright?"

"I'm at the Castle of Lions," Keith started as he scrubbed his face with his hands and exhaled heavily. "Voltron is alright. They got out of Naxzela unharmed and the battle cruiser with Haggar was damaged, so the bomb on the planet was diffused."

"That is a relief," Kolivan commented, his eyes narrowing as he continued, "How did you get through the barrier? The last transmission I heard said it was impenetrable."

Keith looked off to the side, down the hall to where Lotor and the other paladins were waiting, and he inhaled deeply. "It was Lotor. He came out of nowhere and blasted through the barrier, plus damaged the ship. Then he declared a ceasefire and requested a _discussion_."

Kolivan's deadpan face was comical enough to make Keith want to laugh, but in the seriousness of the situation he decided to forgo it and let his leader speak. "Discussion? As in, form an alliance with the Coalition?"

"It appears that way."

"That is... unexpected," the Galra rebel muttered, looking off to the side in thought. "And you say he aided you?"

Keith chewed on his lip and dropped his eyes to his lap. "...He prohibited me from sacrificing myself for the mission, yes."

There was a weighted pause on the other line, followed by a drawn out sigh. Keith looked up to see a troubled look on Kolivan's face, as if he was disappointed in Keith. His frown was deep, carved into the lines of his face and pulling his scar down. "We will discuss that later. What is the Princess requesting we do?"

"She's gathering the rebel leaders on Olkarion," Keith replied, pushing his anxiety away and taking a deep breath. "As of right now, they are discussing the possibility of hearing Lotor out before we arrive. Though she wants to confer with you all and make a more detailed decision on our next step once everyone is on Olkarion. Lotor saved us today, but there's no telling when he'll turn his back on us. He's done so with his own people, so I'm wary."

"Find out what you can from him," Kolivan ordered, his face smoothing out and the distress he had shown moments ago long gone. "I will head to Olkarion with the rest of the Blades and we will go from there. Lotor will have information regardless so it would be in our best interests to start getting it as soon as possible."

"He won't tell us anything until we've pardoned him."

Kolivan frowned. "You know the ways around that. I'll see you in a varga."

"Roger that," Keith grunted before closing the comm and leaning back against the wall once more. He lolled his head to the side, staring down the hall for the umpteenth time, and sighed. The weight of the day was pressing down on him, keeping him from standing and begging him to just _stop._ After all, less than a varga ago, Keith was certain he was going to die. He didn't think past the battle. In fact, he didn't even factor in Lotor as a part of the battle in the first place, so he was stuck.

He felt the Castle jolt slightly, telling him they were making the wormhole jump. Soon, they would be arriving at Olkarion and the Rebel leaders would be making their decision on Lotor. Until then, he would do his best to pry some information out of Lotor and figure out his play. And since he begrudgingly felt a debt to the Galra Prince, Keith felt it was in his best interest to get it out quick and present that intel to the leaders in order to get the process moving faster. After all, one third of the Galra empire had been taken back today. It was in everyone's best interest to take back the rest as soon as possible.

Keith stood, brushed nonexistent dust off of his armor, then made his way down the hall to where Lotor was being held. The ship rocked slightly again, but Keith was not deterred. He had a mission, just like the others, and it would end when the Galra were defeated and the universe was saved.

No matter at the cost of his own life.

When the door slid open, Shiro, Lance, Hunk, and Pidge all turned around and smiled when he entered the room. They had been staring down at Lotor, who was currently sitting behind a particle barrier and smirking to himself.

"He's been awfully quiet," Lance told Keith, as if he knew what Keith was about to ask.

"Give me a minute with him," Keith said, his eyes not leaving Lotor. The Prince's eyebrow shot up, but he did not move to look up at Keith.

"We'll be outside," Shiro said as he patted Keith on the shoulder.

Soon, he was left alone with Lotor, the particle barrier the only thing between them. Keith crossed his arms and waited, testing to see if Lotor would speak first. It didn't take long, much to his surprise. About a minute after the other paladins left, Lotor shifted in his seat, squaring his shoulders to Keith, and meeting Keith's hard glare.

"I never thought I'd have the honor of meeting a member of the Blade of Marmora," Lotor started in his silky voice. Keith frowned, but did not reply. He wasn't going to take Lotor's bait, not until he clarified what the heck he was talking about. "In fact, I don't think I have ever seen one that looked like _you._ You're not like the other paladins, are you?"

"What makes you think I'm a paladin?"

Lotor's smirk never faltered and he replied, "There may be only five dressed in the armor of the Paladins, but I know one when I see one. And besides, I saw you flying that fighter. If I recall, the Black Lion had once moved like that."

Keith bristled. "Perceptive. However, I am not a Paladin anymore."

"Is that so?" Lotor mused. "They still treat you as one of their own, and I did happen to overhear their concern for you before you entered the room. The Black Paladin appeared pretty shaken when he arrived, so I'm assuming it is your fault."

A growl rumbled in Keith's throat, but he still didn't take the bait. "That's not of your concern. What you should be worried about is whether or not the rebels decide if you're worth keeping around."

"If I recall," Lotor started with a prideful tone, "my intervention was pinnacle in your success today. I do believe that's enough to stave the vultures."

"Perhaps," Keith retorted as he sat in the vacated chair in front of the particle barrier. "But they're going to want more than that. Your intervention may have helped us win the day, but many of our pitfalls happened because of you, as well. You'll need to convince them that you're an asset and will actively assist us in taking down Zarkon."

Lotor's eyes were analytical, calculating as he mulled over Keith's words. It wasn't a minute later when he also leaned forward, his face almost touching the particle barrier and his nose level with Keith's. "How about a deal? I tell you something you want to know if you tell me something I want to know. I'll even be considerate enough and let you ask me specifically what you want, as long as you give me the same courtesy."

Keith mulled it over, his eyes searching Lotor's face for any deception. If he was anything like his father, he was cruel and heartless. But something in the back of Keith's mind told him that wasn't the case. Yes, Lotor's eyes were calculating and his smirk was devious, but there was something else lying underneath. Something more... _human_... that Keith felt he could utilize to the Coalition's advantage and finally win this war.

"Fine," he finally said after leaning back. "I want to know what project you are conducting that Zarkon didn't know about."

Lotor chuckled and he leaned back as well, mirroring Keith's posture. "Straight to the point, I see."

"You'll find I'm very straightforward."

"I can see that."

Keith narrowed his eyes and he repeated, "The project, Lotor. I want to know if it's worth keeping you around."

Lotor's eyes scanned Keith's form, lingering at his hip where his blade was sheathed, and he pressed his lips together. After a moment of deliberation, he hummed and looked to the side, where a table held a cup of water. "We were developing ships created from the Trans-Reality Comet's ore. We had two constructed, one of which I have and the other is in possession of my Generals. Since they intended on turning me in, it is no longer an asset. But I have the rest of the ore currently being used for the final ship, and only I know of its location. After one of my Generals had been used as a spy, I secretly had it moved so no one else could take it from me."

"Were these ships designed to counter Voltron?"

Lotor smirked and he shook his head. "Yes and no. They are created with the same materials, yes, but my intention was to use it to mine quintessence from the rift between realities. Unfortunately, I was unable to utilize that ship's purpose."

Keith frowned. "So you're saying you have two ships that are similar to the Lions in your possession?"

"Yes," Lotor stated, his eyes moving to the floor. "And I can reveal to you the location in exchange for amnesty and information. The only ones who know more about the Empire than me are my father and his _witch_."

Keith pinched his lips together and rolled his jaw in thought. The information was useful, but if his Generals were in possession of one of these ships then they could be intending to engage with Voltron or harvest more quintessence. As for the third ship, Lotor would have to give up its location in order to appear reliable to the Coalition. Perhaps even become willing to use it in the fight against Zarkon.

"I will let Princess Allura know of this so she can present it to the Rebel leaders," Keith said as he made to stand.

"Hold on, Paladin. We made a deal, remember?"

Keith's foot faltered and he met Lotor's eyes once more. He gritted his teeth as he sat back down and folded his arms over his chest. "Fine. What do you want to know?"

Lotor's grin grew, showing off his sharp canines, and he looked as if he had just won the Empire already. "You are a member of the Blade of Marmora, as I can see with your armor. So that means you are Galra."

Keith bristled again and he scowled. "That's not a question. That's an observation."

"You're not denying it."

"Because I am."

"Fair enough," the Prince murmured, his grin never faltering.

"You haven't asked your question."

Lotor simply let his eyebrows jump before he sat back and closed his eyes. "In due time, Paladin. I will ask when I see fit."

When the Prince turned his attention to his nails, effectively cutting off the conversation, Keith took that as his cue to leave. He growled under his breath, itching to find out Lotor's play, then whirled around on his heel and all but stomped out of the room.

Outside, the other Paladins were waiting anxiously for him. Lance was the first to speak, stepping forward and shooting his eyebrows up in anticipation as he asked, "So? What did he say?"

Keith grunted and moved past his friends, keeping his head down as he made his way to the elevator. "He gave me a lead that we should look into."

He could tell they all hesitated before following him, Lance hurrying to Keith's side as he said, "Alright, such as? How did you convince him to tell you?"

Keith shrugged as he pressed the button to the elevator and he replied, "I offered him some information in return, anything he was curious about. But he just went ahead and told me what we needed to know and he said he would _'ask when he saw fit.'_ "

There was a pause from the other Paladins, all four looking to each other in confusion and wariness. The door opened and Keith stepped in, then all-but slammed the button that would take them to the bridge.

"Are you sure what he told you is viable?" Hunk asked as the others stepped into the elevator behind him. "For all you know, he could have been lying."

"It wouldn't hurt to check it out," Keith sighed while finally lifting his eyes to meet Hunk's. "If it's true, we may get another huge leg up in this war. If it's not, we would have just wasted time. But I think it's a good enough risk to take, even if I don't know what I have to give him in return quite yet."

"Keith's right," Shiro chimed in. Keith gave him a small grateful smile as the Black Paladin continued, "Anything we can get from Lotor is worth investigating. Once Keith presents the information to the Coalition, we can send a team to look into it and figure out if it's worth our time. Plus, Lotor may be more willing to cooperate if he knows we aren't going to kill him any time soon."

The doors of the elevator opened, revealing the bridge where Allura was currently on a video call with most of the Rebel leaders. The Paladins and Keith slid in quietly, waiting for a moment for Keith to chime in with what he had gathered from Lotor.

"It seems he is willing to cooperate, as long as we allow him to live," Allura stated, causing some of the leaders to express their dislike of the situation. The Princess appeared to roll her eyes and frown as she added, "The Paladins have been interrogating him since he arrived in the Castle of Lions. What he shares with us may be vital in our fight against Zarkon."

Shiro cleared his throat, causing Allura to turn around and the Rebel leaders to bring their attention to the Paladins.

"Keith was able to gather some intel that may be worth investigating," he remarked as he made his way to his seat in the bridge. The other Paladins followed suit, sitting in their respective spots. Keith noticed Lance had hesitated, looking back and forth from Keith and Allura before settling in the Red Paladin's seat. "He was willing to comply, and is willing to give up more valuable information if we grant him the amnesty and alliance he is requesting."

Allura's eyes went to Keith and he nodded, which caused her to smile. Keith stepped towards Allura, purposely gathering the attention of the Rebel leaders as he started, "When I spoke to Lotor, he was willing to give me a lead as long as I revealed something to him in return."

"And what did he request?" Ryner asked first, her voice calm and her face inquisitive. Out of all the Rebel leaders, Keith knew her to be the most reasonable and logical. Her support and understanding would help make a decisive move on Lotor.

"That..." Keith trailed off, chewing on his lip as he debated on how to phrase his next statement. "That is something he has not specified yet."

"So he gave you his information without exchange?" Captain Olia inquired skeptically, her eyes squinting behind her goggles. "Sounds like a trap, if you ask me."

"He has no reason to give us false information," Keith countered. "He has been labeled an enemy of the Galra Empire, plus he literally prevented all of us from dying a varga ago. If you ask me, the fact that he even came to us was out of desperation for his own survival. Despite the fact that he was Emperor Pro Tem, he didn't _actually_ attack anyone except Voltron. What he told me was proof enough that he had no intention of continuing Zarkon's legacy within the Empire."

Keith noticed Allura watching him and he turned to her to see her narrowing her eyes in thought. She was rolling her jaw back in forth, her mind working at the speed of light, and she swallowed before asking, "What was this information he gave you?"

"He built ships," Keith started, conscious of the widening of the eyes of the Rebel leaders and the startled looks coming from the Paladins. "He... acquired a Trans-Reality Comet, one of the same material Voltron had been created from. The ship he has been piloting was created from the ore, and he informed me that there was one other that had already been finished, but it is in possession of his Generals who had turned on him."

He observed the nervous looks on the Rebel leaders' faces, but chose to ignore their panicked gasps as he continued, "There was a third ship under construction at the time he was labeled a traitor to the Galra Empire, and he informed me that it was moved to a secret location that no one but himself and the alchemists working on know of."

There were murmurs among the Rebel leaders and their own forces behind them. Shiro turned in his seat to look toward Keith, as did the other Paladins. Keith noticed a troubled look on Allura's face, as well as the oddly thoughtful one on Coran's.

"Did he say what his intention of the ships was?" Lieutenant Ozar asked, his voice carrying over the discombobulated voices of the other leaders. "Was it meant to be a weapon to use against Voltron? Or did it serve another purpose."

Keith took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Both. It's main purpose is to go between realities and harvest the quintessence there."

A collective gasp cut through the room and Keith looked up to see everyone looking at him with shock. Until the Castle landed on Olkarion, the Rebel leaders discussed the course of action they should take regarding Lotor, going from shooting him into space in a broken pod to letting him freeze at an outpost in order to monitor Galra radio chatter.

"It's ultimately up to you, Princess Allura," Ryner stated after the debating quieted. "We are in debt to him for destroying the battleship that was controlling Naxzela, so that may be enough to stay your hand until we investigate his intel."

The Princess immediately turned to Keith, her eyes pleading as she searched his face. He watched as she debated internally, considering every single outcome of all the suggestions the leaders gave her, but appearing to come up with nothing.

"What do you think, Keith?" she whispered, low enough that no one else would hear.

"I think we should check it out," he replied just as quietly. "If what he told us plays out, we'll have two more ships on our side that are strong enough to destroy Galra shields and ships. We could really use the firepower and someone who can operate them."

"How will we know if he intends on betraying us again?" Her eyes were wide with doubt, but the fear in the depths shone through past the mistrust towards the Galra Prince. Keith could see the minor hope in her eyes; a way to win the war, and from Zarkon's son, no less. It seemed almost too good to be true but nonetheless Lotor was an obtainable ally.

"There's nothing to lose," Keith murmured. Allura sighed and he added, "He saved us all today. Let's show him our thanks by not killing him. Yet."

Allura looked resigned, but resolute at the same time. She inhaled deeply, then brought her attention back to the Rebel leaders. "We will investigate Lotor's claims, and if they are true we will allow him to operate the ships under the supervision of other rebels. If he turns on us, I give permission to kill on site."

There was a collective agreement from the Rebels before the video links were dropped. Olkarion loomed in the distance and Keith watched Allura sag with weariness. She met his eyes once more, smiling softly as she did, then turned to Coran and ordered him to take the ship in for the landing.

"Come," she ordered him, her voice gentle and her hand light as he gripped his arm and led him off the bridge and towards the elevator. Once they were away from the prying eyes of the other Paladins and the doors closed, Allura turned to him once more and placed her other hand on his open arm. "Do you know what he's wanting from us? I don't want to be thrown off guard by his request."

Keith sighed and leaned into her, letting himself feel strength from her presence, and he replied, "All I can guess is he wants to know about either the Blades of Marmora or more specifically myself."

Allura frowned in confusion. "What? Why would you come to that conclusion?"

"He had made the observation that I must be Galra because of association with the Blades," he muttered, chin lowering but his gaze never leaving Allura's. "He may be curious about the involvement of his own people in the fight against his father."

He watched as Allura's eyes darted back and forth between his, searching for something. She sighed, then closed the distance between them for another hug. Her arms were loose around his waist, hands splayed against his back as she rested her head on his shoulder. Keith snaked his arms around her, as well, resting his hands on her shoulder blades and bringing her closer.

"It has been a very long day," he murmured against her hair as he let his eyes slide closed.

"I could use a nap," she replied while she nuzzled closer to him. A warmth blossomed in his chest and spread to his fingers, causing him to tighten his hold on her a little more, and he sighed against her. Allura's hand reached up and pulled down his hood, then she ran her gloved fingers through his hair. "I wish we could just sit down and not worry about this stupid war for just a few dobashes... I am so tired."

He nodded and pulled away from her, his hands sliding down her arms and resting on her wrists. "As much as I want that, we have a war to win. Zarkon won't wait for us to rest our feet and take a nap."

Allura snorted then gave him a small grin before stepping out of the elevator and heading down the hall. Someone had to tell Lotor the news of the tentative deal, so it may as well be her. Although they didn't vocalize the fact, Keith knew that was their destination. And he knew Allura trusted him to be by her side when she extended the olive branch.

Right before they reached the door, Keith reached out and grabbed her wrist. "Allura, wait..."

Allura turned around, a question hanging on her lips, and she waited. Keith swallowed and he licked his lips in a poor attempt to ground himself. So much had happened in the past day, an exhausting amount of things, really. And the fact that she had remained grounded, enough to the point where she was able to bring him back from the brink of breaking down after his stunt during the battle, it was incredible. There were no words he could find to express his gratitude for her today. Although the other Paladins had shown him support and love, it was Allura who had shown the most concern and trust for him. It was her that gave him the strength to continue on despite his recent brush with death.

"I..." He looked back and forth between her eyes, the words stuck in his throat and his thundering heart picking up pace. "Thank you. For today."

Her smile was warm as she turned his hand around and wove their fingers together. "Think nothing of it, Keith. I care about you and your well-being. Just... don't do that again, okay?"

He couldn't help but grin and nod at her. Allura stepped towards him and raised her other hand to cup his cheek. "I mean it. You're very important to me, Keith. I don't want to lose you."

Keith lifted his hand and held hers against his cheek a second longer, thawing with her touch and feeling his worthlessness practically melt away. He gave her another soft smile and said, "You don't know how much that means to me."

Allura's eyes crinkled and he could have sworn her cheeks darkened just a little bit. "I think I have an idea... Now let's go tell Lotor the good news. I'm sure he would be thrilled to know he's not dying today."

Without another word, Allura took a tentative step backwards and gave Keith one last smile before she turned around and opened the door. Keith hesitated a moment, his heart warm and beating fast against his chest. But unlike before, it wasn't out of panic. It was out of affection, knowing he was treasured by so many people and they truly cared if he lived or died.

It was that thought alone that pushed him through the door to stand by Allura's side as she spoke to Lotor. It was what would keep him by her side for the rest of this war, as long as he could help it.

* * *

 _fin._


End file.
